Request reaps wealth of good questions

Three weeks ago in this column, I lamented the fact that some people never ask questions, which makes conversations difficult for the question-askers among us. In exchange for an e-mailed question of any kind, I offered lists of questions aimed at young people and adults. The lists were compiled by Tom Lickona, a “character education” expert from State University of New York at Cortland.

The column generated 155 e-mail questions from readers, the most I have ever received. In the original column, I explored the two main theories why people don’t ask questions: They were never taught how. Or they are so self-absorbed that they simply don’t care.

Readers offered some other explanations. A few of the older readers pointed out that they were raised to believe that it’s rude to ask personal questions. Others told me that they simply don’t know what kinds of questions to ask in social situations.

So the remainder of this column is a public service to those people who desire to ask more questions but lack the material. Here are the best questions, culled from the 155 e-mails, along with a few of Lickona’s questions and a couple of my standard ones. Some of the questions readers sent in were borrowed from other sources. That’s OK. We’ll spread the wealth.

• Icebreaker questions.

Create a T-shirt. What words would you put on it?

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

What is your favorite smell?

Where would you go in the world and who would you take with you?

If you could only eat one food for a week, what would it be?

What are five words that describe you? What two words would your best friend add to that list?

What are three things you’d like written on your tombstone?

What is your favorite color? What would it smell like if it had a smell? Taste like if you could eat it?

What was your childhood nickname?

• Questions about questions.

Is it possible to ask too many questions?

What is a question you’ve never been asked but wish you had?

What is the one question you most regret never asking?

Is the person who was always the “new kid” in school less likely to be a question-asking adult than the person who lived in one place most of his or her life?

How do you get young people to answer your questions with more than “I don’t know” and “Whatever”?

What was the most interesting question you’ve ever been asked?

• Meaning of life questions.

What have been the three most challenging times in your life and what did you learn from them?

Have you ever read a book (or seen a movie) that caused you to think differently about an issue?

What is your next great goal on your life’s to-do list?

What happened in your life so far that you didn’t expect?

What do you think is your calling in life?

What do you think about when you can’t fall asleep?

What is the one thing you enjoy doing to the point that you know that this is what you are here in life to do?

What makes your life complete?

What’s one way you’ve helped someone – not a member of your family and not in the course of your paid work?

What scene in your life would you rewrite?

• Questions for those in crisis.

How can I be of more help to you?

Who else can I call to be here for you?

What would you like to see happen?

Would it help you most if I sat here silently and asked no more questions?