A license for trouble, a la cart
In a CdA store parking lot Saturday, May 6, a middle-age woman began tongue-lashing another shopper for not taking her cart back to the rack. Angry Woman: “That’s how cars get dinged up.” Heated words followed. Then, as Cart Culprit drove off, she noticed the plates on her accuser’s car were from California. “The license plate explains it all!!!” screamed Cart Culprit, vindicated. Dunno how many exclamation points were in her throat. But To Blog Or Not To Blog used three in retelling the story. The blogger knows Angry Woman and her daughter, the real owner of the car and a fifth-generation Idahoan who’d just moved back from California after working as a pastry chef. Angry Woman shouted this out to Cart Culprit ere she drove out of sight, adding: “You’re just lazy.” Then, Daughter of Angry Woman stated the obvious re: Cart Culprit: “She’s probably from California herself.”
Malodorous Barbie
Remember our discussion last week about “North Idaho Barbies” – you know, about the characteristics and accessories Barbies from CdA, Sandpoint, Athol and other towns would have? Well, Bill Hochstatter of Colfax, Wash., had a close encounter with Lewiston Barbie. Last summer, Bill e-mails, he was behind a fat SUV with a “Goddess Onboard” bumper sticker while driving from Lewiston to Clarkston. Take it away, Bill: “At the next light I pulled up beside the SUV. The driver was a bottle blonde with a tattoo on her shoulder, and she was smoking a cigar! She sure wouldn’t be my definition of a goddess.” Bill didn’t mention Lewiston Barbie’s perfume. If she was from malodorous Lewiston, you can only imagine.
Dumb thieves
If you’re going to swipe $216 worth of T-shirts from the Pendulum/CdA, don’t sign up for karaoke or wear a North Idaho College soccer sweat shirt. Three femmes did one or the other before grabbing armfuls of T-shirts and bolting out the door. The barkeep easily ID’d one and possibly two suspects by Googling the NIC soccer Web site. D’oh … You’re not even 10. Yet, you have a short profile on Wikipedia, the free online encyclopedia. You’re Shasta Groene and you wished you didn’t … Yeah, there’s a CdA woman whose car features a “Jesus fish” and a Hooters sticker. If anyone follows her looking for foxy waitresses, she temporizes, they might end up at church. Tricksy Evangelicals.
Huckleberries
As his University of Idaho days were winding down, Vandal Sense blogger Sam Taylor faced a big decision. What to wear to graduation? Nah. He couldn’t decide which beer to buy for his celebration kegger … Imagine yourself as a Lake City Junior Academy official waking up to the Coeur d’Alene Press Wednesday. On the Local section front, you find a story alleging that teacher Andy Armstrong, 42, had played a strip card game with several underage boys during an April campout. On the next page, you find a corner ad inviting the town that day to visit the school where “a quality, Christian education is right around the corner.” Ouch … Berry Pickers are debating whether Idaho congressional wannabe Sheila Sorensen meant to erect that large sign at Mission & Idaho Road – on the Washington side of the state line?
Parting shot
A college femme told Huckleberries she’d never heard the N-word used in public, let alone shouted across a store in anger, until she was shopping for vintage clothes at St. Vinny’s this week. Seems an unkempt, long-haired man roared out the epithet after employees refused to allow his dog to enter the store. “I didn’t know what to do,” said the collegian. “My brain just shut down.” The Aryans may be gone, but the battle for hearts and minds continues.