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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Ask teachers to correct classmate

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar The Spokesman-Review

Dear Annie: I attend summer school with “Jon,” who has a mild intellectual disability. Jon is a very nice boy, and everyone likes him, including me. But I have one problem. We’ve become such good friends, he now has the idea that I love him. He constantly tries to put his arm around me when we sit next to each other in class, and he calls me his “sweetie.”

I know this is not his fault, and I completely understand he doesn’t mean to make me feel weird, but I am really uncomfortable. I’ve tried to explain it to him, but even when he says he understands, he’s at it again the next day. I asked my teachers to speak to Jon, and they said not to worry because it’s unintentional.

It reached the point last week that I yelled at him to stop touching me, and I made him so upset, he hit his desk. I apologized a billion times, and he forgave me, but now other kids at school think I’m a monster. What makes it worse is there are nasty rumors spreading about me being prejudiced. This really hurts. How can I deal with Jon and these other kids? – V.

Dear V.: Try to ignore the nasty rumors. Anyone who knows you will understand what happened and can explain it to those who are spreading gossip. Meanwhile, the teachers need to be more involved in this situation. Jon should not be touching you without your permission, regardless of his developmental abilities. He must learn to differentiate between friendship and romance, not only for your sake, but for his.

Dear Annie: My husband’s brother and his wife hold an annual combined birthday party for their two children. This year we were invited for snacks, which included raw vegetables and dip.

My brother-in-law dipped his carrots directly into the bowl of dip, ate a bite, then proceeded to dip the same carrot again. We all saw him double dip. When my sister-in-law served the cake, she licked the frosting off her fingers after cutting each slice and used those same fingers to place each slice of cake on a plate. I was mortified. How can we politely turn down the food? – California Cooties

Dear California: It’s easy enough to say, “We’ll skip the cake because we’re cutting down on sweets.” But you might get hungry eventually, and at the rate your in-laws are licking the food, you’ll starve to death. It’s OK to take your sister-in-law aside and say, “I’m sure you don’t realize you’re licking your fingers and then placing them on the cake. Some of your guests might object.” You can do the same with your brother-in-law.