Arrow-right Camera

The Spokesman-Review Newspaper The Spokesman-Review

Monday, October 26, 2020  Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883
Clear Night 15° Clear
News >  Features

Annie’s Mailbox: Tell mom to stay away when drunk

Kathy Mitchell/Marcy Sugar

Dear Annie: I love my mother, but not after 7 p.m., when she starts drinking. For 11 years, I have suffered through her alcoholic abuse and have been ravaged by the physical and emotional agony that come with it.

My family and I have done everything possible to tell her how much we care and want her to get help. She always replies with a wonderful speech about how she will change and make sure we all stay together and happy. But after about a week, she reverts to her old ways. My mother is a lovely person with a good heart, but she endured a lot of emotional pain in the past and likes to drown it out instead of dealing with it.

I recently married and am thankful to be away from the situation. I have just discovered that I am expecting my first child. You cannot imagine the sheer joy I feel, along with the complete horror of seeing my drunken mother wanting to be a part of my baby’s life.

I want Mom to be a loving, reliable grandmother, but so far, she has not been able to control herself. This has become a constant worry. I don’t want my child brought up around alcohol. How do I allow Mom to be near the baby when she cannot control her drinking? – Michigan Mom-to-Be

Dear Michigan: When Mom is drunk, she should not be around your child, and you should tell her so. Hopefully, access to the new grandchild will provide the incentive for her to finally get the help she needs. If you believe she is depressed and is self-medicating with alcohol, encourage her to discuss this with her doctor. Tell her you will make the appointment and go with her. If she truly wants to sober up, she will do this. In the meantime, please contact Al-Anon (al-anon.alateen.org) at (888) 4AL-ANON (1-888-425-2666), for family and friends of those with drinking problems.

E-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@ comcast.net.
The Spokesman-Review Newspaper

Local journalism is essential.

Give directly to The Spokesman-Review's Northwest Passages community forums series -- which helps to offset the costs of several reporter and editor positions at the newspaper -- by using the easy options below. Gifts processed in this system are not tax deductible, but are predominately used to help meet the local financial requirements needed to receive national matching-grant funds.

Subscribe to the Coronavirus newsletter

Get the day’s latest Coronavirus news delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our newsletter.



New health insurance plans available Nov. 1 through Washington Healthplanfinder

 (Photo courtesy WAHBE)
Sponsored

Fall means the onset of the cold and flu season.