How much child care is too much?

Guilt. Many parents who work outside the home know the feeling – especially during the toddler and preschool years.

Six months after my eldest child was born, I went back to work. Two to three days a week wasn’t too bad. In fact, the part-time schedule proved to be a blessing since it gave me a chance to earn some money, use my skills and establish balance in my life.

When I had to start coming into the office 40 hours a week, however, everything changed. I was constantly torn between my job and family. I was wracked with guilt over the fact that someone else was taking care of my child.

I had great child care, but I still felt bad because my son spent most of his waking hours without me.

Most of us don’t have a choice. We have to work to pay the mortgage or rent, to buy groceries, to access health care and other needs.

And no matter how emotional we feel about putting our children in child care, there are some benefits – for the family as well as the child.

According to a recent Reuters story, a long-running U.S. National Institutes of Health study has found that children who have high-quality child care see academic benefits lasting into high school.

The keyword, of course, is quality. Our children make gains only when they receive excellent care, which the NIH measured by how much time the provider spends interacting with the children, as well as warmth, support and cognitive stimulation.

We were and continue to be lucky enough to have quality child care for our children. But we also made some career and lifestyle changes that allowed me to spend more time with my kids.

As a result, they received the best of both worlds: time with their parents but also two to three full days each week at a wonderful children’s center where teachers nurtured their natural curiosity, love of the outdoors and other gifts.

They also learned how to collaborate and coexist with other kids – a skill that they don’t necessarily acquire when they’re hanging out with me at home.

What do you think are the benefits of placing a child in a child care setting? How many hours a week is ideal for your children and family?

– Posted by Virginia de Leon

Join the conversation at www.spokesman.com/ blogs/parents.