Adult daughter needs ground rules

Dear Annie: I have a 35-year-old daughter with two children (ages 13 and 2), and they all are living with us. “Micki” moved in after leaving her common-law husband a few months ago. He was the third man in her life.

Since Micki has been home, she has been going out every weekend. I am “old school” and believe she should come home from work and take care of my grandchildren. But if I open my mouth, my wife will toss me out. It has already happened once before.

This situation is slowly killing me. My wife tells me Micki is still young. I say, so what? That doesn’t mean she can go to bed with every Tom, Dick and Harry. I don’t know what to do next. Any suggestions? – One Step from Leaving

Dear One Step: Micki is not as young as your wife thinks. At 35, she is closer to middle-aged. Unless your wife wishes to enable her daughter to remain irresponsible, the two of you need to set some ground rules regarding Micki’s behavior. A social night out once a week is fine. A weekend sleeping around is not. Encourage your wife to put her grandchildren’s welfare first and see if you can come to an agreement regarding Micki’s responsibilities at home.