Caller feels friend not showing respect

Dear Annie: I have a friend who has the “call waiting” feature on his phone. If I am talking to him and a second call comes in, he will say, “Oh, I have another call,” and either hang up on me, or leave me waiting interminably while he chats with the second caller. Once he kept me holding so long, I finally hung up.

However, if I am the second caller, he will say, “I’m on the other line. Can I call you back?” This seems to indicate that other callers are always more important to him than I am. Unless it is a dire emergency, I feel the first call should take priority. I also think his treatment of me is disrespectful.

My friend also has “Caller ID,” so he knows who the second call is from and doesn’t need to answer it unless he believes it’s urgent. Is there an etiquette rule for this? Am I wrong to feel rudely treated? – Unimportant Caller

Dear Caller: Etiquette says the person with whom you are already on the phone takes precedence over an incoming call. Your friend should put you on hold just long enough to inform the second caller that he will call back. However, if your conversation has already gone on for quite a while, it makes sense for you to say, “Go ahead and get that. I’ll talk to you later.” Courtesy works both ways.