Rough procedure, so why not bring the dog?

Tue., March 22, 2011

Catherine Johnston And Rebecca Nappi

About EndNotes

Today, The Spokesman-Review introduces EndNotes, a question-and-answer column that addresses the etiquette and other appropriate responses to chronic illness, death and dying, grief and loss.

Syndicated throughout the United States by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services, the column is written by Spokesman-Review features writer Rebecca Nappi and Catherine Johnston, an Olympia writer who works in hospital management.

Both writers have master’s degrees in theology-related studies and they co-authored a book on marriage in 2006.

Both have also held bedside vigils with dying loved ones, planned memorial services, and written and delivered eulogies. They’ve also walked with others through serious illnesses; Johnston is a cancer survivor.

Every day, for the next 10 years, 10,000 baby boomers will reach 65. Many will have questions on the best ways to respond when facing grief of all kinds. EndNotes discusses these questions in this column and at spokesman.com/blogs/endnotes

Q.I need to have a hip replaced and will spend a few days in the hospital. I want my wife to bring our dog into the hospital when she comes to visit. She thinks I am crazy for making this request. Your opinion?

A.Believe it or not, many health care facilities do allow pets and even write policies to guide employees, patients and visitors as to when, where and how our pets can visit.

These policies are influenced by state and federal regulations addressing patient safety, infection control and the environment of care. Call your hospital and ask about its policy.

Your dog may be welcome, but your exotic snake will be sent home at the hospital entrance.

Often service animals and family pets are allowed in specific areas of the hospital, like a transitional care or physical rehabilitation unit, but are excluded from the cafeteria, isolation rooms and any patient care area where treatment may be compromised by whatever a beloved pet could unknowingly bring in. Therefore, you may be asked to have a veterinarian complete a health certificate for your pet.

Our pets are part of our families and they bring great comfort in times of suffering. According to the United States Humane Society, 39 percent of U.S. households own at least one dog. Expect to see more pets visiting hospitals as our country moves toward more holistic healing practices.

If your dog weighs 12 pounds and is accustomed to sitting on your lap, you may find joy and relaxation from a visit, although, after a hip replacement, you may want to keep Fido on the floor.

If he is a 95-pound German shepherd who will sit on the floor while you pet him, he will be a wonderful distraction as well as a comfort.

Be certain that Fido has had his shots and documentation of his shots is up-to-date. He needs to be on a leash and well-behaved.

If other animals are visiting, be aware and keep your doggy away from them. Even dogs who play well with others should not be romping around in a medical facility.

Our pets provide a kind of affection that is immeasurable, but very important. I am certain that any time you spend with your dog will offer comfort – whether at the hospital or while you recover at home.

Q.What food and beverages are appropriate to take to the home of a grieving family?

A.Friends tend to bring sweets to a home where people are mourning a death or dealing with another crisis, such as a cancer diagnosis. Sweets are easy to bake or buy, and we assume people crave comfort food like cake, pie and pastries.

But when you visit a grieving family or a home in crisis, notice how many bakery goods are stacked on the table.

Be more creative and nutritious. Here are some basic guidelines:

• Don’t take over anything that requires a lot of cooking on the part of the family or mourners. Spaghetti sauce with pasta that must be cooked isn’t as easy as baked lasagna that simply requires warming in the oven or microwave.

• Opt for simplicity and good nutrition. When Catherine’s husband, Brian, was diagnosed with cancer, Catherine was so distraught she literally forgot to cook or eat. Her friend Cynthia showed up with an enormous pot of cream of mushroom soup. The soup was nutritious and comforting.

People in grief often report that it’s sometimes overwhelming to sit down to chewy foods, such as steak and crunchy vegetables. Err on the side of simple, easy-to-eat food.

• Conventional wisdom says to bring prepared food items in dishes and pans from your home, marked with your name for later return.

But even this is too much to ask a person in grief or in crisis. Instead, put food items in aluminum or plastic containers that they can reuse or throw away.

• Offer a “freeze-for-later” option. Grieving people often lose their appetites, sometimes for weeks. So the best dishes will have some flexibility. Heat and eat right away or freeze for later.

Include warming or baking instructions, whenever the food is used.

• Don’t forget to include beverages. People in grief often forget to drink as much water as they usually do, and dehydration can exacerbate grief exhaustion. A case of bottled water is always welcome.

And if adult family members imbibe, don’t forget a bottle of their favorite wine, a six-pack of their favorite beer or a bottle of hard liquor.

• Finally, don’t abandon the pies and cakes entirely. Slices of these treats are easy to serve to guests.

Catherine Johnston, a health care professional from Olympia, and Rebecca Nappi, Spokesman-Review features writer, welcome your questions about what to do in times of illness, dying, death and grief. Contact them through their blog at spokesman.com/blogs/endnotes.