Fall can be defined quite literally

You might want to get your excuses ready.

Because, as you may have noticed, it’s October. It won’t be long before someone asks.

“Why don’t we go ice skating?”

Now if you can skate, that’s fine. You should feel free to reply, “Yes, by all means.”

Ice skating is invigorating. It’s OK exercise and a sensory treat. Tracing graceful arcs in the frozen surface, and all that.

It can be fun for the whole family, as they say. And this far north, it almost seems as if regional pride would nudge you toward getting some ice time every fall/winter.

But if you cannot skate, there’s something you should know. People who can skate will tell you it’s easy. That is a lie.

“C’mon, you’ll pick it right up,” they’ll say.

Right. That could happen, on rare occasions. But if skaters trying to coax a novice out onto the rink told the truth, here’s what they would say.

“You are going down. And it will happen so fast you will not have time to wonder what went wrong before you find yourself in a bruised heap on the hard, unforgiving ice.”

This happens to everyone. It is survivable.

Still, when skaters invite nonskaters to lace up the blades they are, in essence, luring them into a crash.

No one says “Let’s go skating and see how many times your feet go out from under you.”

No one says “Let’s go skating and see Mr. Gravity reel you back in for a rude interface with the granitelike ice.”

Here’s the thing, though. Ice skating can be worth the trouble. When conditions are right, it can be a seriously excellent way to savor the season.

So here’s a tip: Sign up for lessons.

If you get a good, reassuring teacher, you will soon understand how skating is about balance and fluid motion.

Once you know how you are supposed to move, you can strive to improve. Then, eventually, something remarkable will happen. You’ll get it. Your choppy, uncertain strides will turn into something akin to rhythm.

And when you fall? You can learn how to get back up.

Today’s Slice question: What is your most vivid memory of learning to skate?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. What’s the highest you ever climbed in a tree? How about your cat?