Tip No. 1: You want to put in writing both your short-term and your long-term dating goals.
My short-term goals were about meeting new and interesting men and I wanted to have fun dating. My long-term goal was about being in a committed relationship. Both worked out well for me and they can for you too when you start your journey with this exercise.
Tip No. 2: Stop making excuses for not dating.
I hear women say, “Now isn’t the right time (and I ask them if not now, when?); or they have to lose 10 pounds before they can even think about dating.” This type of thinking comes from fear. When you’re feeling this way, take a baby step and go on one dating site. Once you’ve taken one step and you’ve had some success, the next step will be a lot easier. The cool thing is … you might find you’re having fun!
Tip No. 3: Not understanding the language men speak and hear may be keeping you from finding a great guy. (By the way, they are not women in men’s bodies!)
Men don’t love talking about feelings, although they are far more emotional than you think. They just don’t know how to express it thanks to feelings often being squelched by adults in their childhood. By learning the language men speak and hear, you’re going to find that you start getting your needs met more often without having to ask for what you want over and over again.
Tip No. 4: End the cycle of being overly perfectionistic about what men must have in order to date you.
It’s far more important to look for someone who will make you laugh and open your heart than it is to find a man who is 6 feet tall.
Tip No. 5: Get out of your comfort zone and date men who are different than your usual type.
Your usual type hasn’t made you happy in the past so why will he start making you happy now?
Tip No. 6: Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right!
Henry Ford said this about developing cars. Turns out it’s true for just about every aspect of your life, including finding good men and dating.
Tip No. 7: Stop dating from your mind and start dating from your heart.
Your heart doesn’t necessarily want what your mind does when it comes to a man. Remember your mind is always trying to keep you safe and in your comfort zone. Your heart wants you to feel loved, cherished and adored which are qualities you want in a man if one of your goals is to be in a long term relationship.
Tip No. 8: Go from invisibility to “Rock Star Visibility” with great pictures and a warm inviting profile online.
Men are visual, and they want to see you and your beautiful smile not pictures of your cat, the scenery from your last vacation or your favorite outfit without you in it.
Here’s the difference a great profile and awesome pictures can make. Laurie of New Jersey writes, “It’s only been about 24 hours since I put my new profile and pictures online. Forty-nine men want to meet me, 14 have written to me including two of my ‘top 10 prospects’ as have two other men I really would be interested in talking to. And the notes are so flattering and sweet. This is more activity than I’ve had in a year.”
Tip No. 9: Dating can be both overwhelming and exhausting.
It’s important to take a break whenever you need to. Get back in touch with what lights you up. Once you do, you’ll feel rejuvenated and ready to date again.
Tip No. 10: Have fun and enjoy yourself on a date meeting someone new and interesting.
Everyone has a story … your job is to find out what his is. Definitely makes a date a lot more fun!
Lisa Copeland is “The Dating Coach Who Makes Dating Fun and Easier after 50!” Find out more at Findaqualityman.com.
Local journalism is essential.
Give directly to The Spokesman-Review's Northwest Passages community forums series -- which helps to offset the costs of several reporter and editor positions at the newspaper -- by using the easy options below. Gifts processed in this system are not tax deductible, but are predominately used to help meet the local financial requirements needed to receive national matching-grant funds.
Subscribe to the Coronavirus newsletter
Get the day’s latest Coronavirus news delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our newsletter.