Dear Annie 12/1

Dear Annie: My husband tells me that I’m cheating on him by talking to my friends and family. He talks to people on the phone who I don’t even know, but I don’t ever worry about it or get on his case about it. What can I do? – Needing Help in Virginia

Dear Needing Help: Your husband’s controlling attitude is not just toxic but may constitute emotional abuse. According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, two hallmarks of abusive behavior are showing extreme jealousy and preventing and discouraging you from spending time with friends, family members or peers. I encourage you to call the National Domestic Violence Hotline (800) 799-7233 or chat with someone via their website (https://www.thehotline.org) for further perspective as well as resources. Partners are meant to lift each other up.

Dear Annie: Your advice to “Strained Communication” was perfect: “Run, run, as fast as you can.” Our son married a charmer who wanted to get married quickly. She had a great reputation and nice family, but things aren’t always as they seem. Shortly after marriage, we began to see the real person who was extremely controlling, crying uncontrollably, emotional meltdowns/tantrums and vindictive behavior, just to name a few bad behaviors. She ruined every holiday, family get-together and vacation we had as a family. No doubt, she has a mental issue, but she was refusing to try and improve herself, and, instead, blaming everyone else. Please, please don’t marry quickly. In our situation, she had to get married before we saw the real person; otherwise, the marriage never would have happened. Our son and family learned the hard way. They’ve since split up. – Wiser in Tennessee

Dear Wiser: I appreciate your sharing the wisdom, though I’m sorry to hear how it was earned.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.