Considering how many emotional pitfalls that life holds, it's a wonder any of us make it to adulthood with even a hint of self-confidence.
Next time you're in public, just watch the different ways that people try to shame each other - wives throwing guilt at their husbands, husbands doing the same to their wives and both taking their frustrations out on any child unlucky enough to stray into the firing line.
If people treated their pets as badly as some people treat their children, they'd be locked up for cruelty.
Shame and its various consequences have long been a theme of family counselor John Bradshaw. The author of such books as "Healing the Shame that Binds You" and "Family Secrets," Bradshaw may be best known through his public television series titled "Bradshaw on the Family."
If you've ever wanted to know more about his theories, now is your chance to question him in person. Bradshaw will hold a one-day workshop on "overcoming destructive behaviors and developing healthy lifestyle techniques" from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 4, in the Spokane Falls Community College Music/Performing Arts Auditorium.
The workshop will be divided into three parts: building personal boundaries, creating healthy relationships and dealing with family secrets.
The workshop fee is $95. For reservation information, call 533-3771.
Coming together: For months now, we've been writing about the Essential Peacemaking process. We've done so for a couple of reasons.
One, its main theme is gender reconciliation, which also happens to be the theme of this column.
Two, it's just another way for each of us to improve both our lives and the lives of our loved ones by taking responsibility for our feelings. And when do we feel more vulnerable than in the presence of the opposite gender?
Don and Magdalena McCloskey will hold a basic one-day training Essential Peacemaking session from 9:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. Oct. 28. The training will attempt to demonstrate how it feels to be heard and appreciated by the opposite gender, to hear how members of the opposite gender talk among themselves - and it will attempt to do this in a safe and caring atmosphere. The fee is $35. For more information, call 327-1770.
Just for discussion: Neo-feminist Camille Paglia has this to say about traditional feminism and the dangers of date rape: "For a decade, feminists have drilled their disciples to say, 'Rape is a crime of violence but not of sex.' This sugar-coated Shirley Temple nonsense has exposed young women to disaster. Misled by feminism, they do not expect rape from the nice boys from good homes who sit next to them in class."