Arrow-right Camera
The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Cheap Seats

Democracy at work

When the St. Louis Cardinals dealt third-string catcher Pat Borders to California, Borders arrived in the American League with the fifth-most votes of any National League catcher on the All-Star ballot.

“That’s amazing,” Borders said. “I didn’t even know I was on the ballot. You play everyday, and you don’t get any votes. You don’t play at all, and you get votes.”

Someone asked if being in the A.L. might have hurt his chances of getting more votes in the N.L., where he finished eighth.

“The only thing that’s going to hurt my chances is playing,” he said.

Even more flabbergasted was New York Mets catcher Todd Hundley, who trailed sixth others in the voting, including Jayhawk Owens of Colorado.

“Is there really a guy named Jayhawk Owens?” Hundley sniffed.

Yeah, but he’s not a household name like you, Todd.

Bit of a hickey wicket, don’t you think?

Just what is that red mark on Steffi Graf’s neck? That’s the big question at Wimbledon these days.

“Steff’s Bite On The Side” screamed a front page headline Wednesday in the Daily Star. The Daily Mirror carried a full-page photo of Graf with the spot on her neck circled in red - accompanied by the wink-wink explanation that her boyfriend, race car driver Mike Bartels, was in town.

Asked during a press conference if the mark were an injury, Graf replied, “No, no injuries.”

“Vampires?” a reporter asked.

“Vampires, yes exactly,” Graf replied.

Is she certain it wasn’t the Werewolves of London?

Mary, Mary, quite contrary

Elsewhere on the Wimbledon beat, we nominate Simon Barnes of the London Times for president of the Mary Pierce Fan Club: “She clearly has ambitions of beating the Ivan Lendl all-Wimbledon record for the number of times the ball is bounced between serves,” Barnes wrote. “She is already way ahead of all contenders for the record of self-administered hair strokes during a service game.

“And she’s on the pole position in the championships this year for assuming the double-teapot position: both hands on hips in frank disbelief that any line judge, any umpire could do such a thing, to such a person as she, at such a time as this.”

At least he’s not dead, like some CFL picks

Chad Kalmakoff will remember this year’s NHL Draft, even if the NHL doesn’t remember him.

The 20-year-old from Swift Current thought he’d been selected in the third round by Toronto when the Leafs actually took Konstantin Kalmikov of the Colonial Hockey League. But Kalmakoff’s name appeared on the draft board and was circulated by wire services, and he promptly went out to celebrate.

“At least I had my 6 hours of glory,” said Kalmakoff. “Oh, well - it’s just back to life as my everyday self.”

The last word …

“The problem is, they told me I could lose my saliva glands indefinitely. I just don’t know. I’ve never seen a ballplayer who couldn’t spit.”

- Outfielder Brett Butler, on having surgery for throat cancer

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo