Past Thoughts Valid Today
Dear Ann Landers: A letter that appeared in your column in February 1986 has been on our refrigerator ever since. My husband and I raised our three sons using the principles set forth in that column. Our first grandchild is now 1 year old. Will you please run that column again for a new generation of parents? It is a proven formula for producing decent children and responsible citizens. Today’s parents need all the help they can get. - Grandma in Connecticut
Dear Grandma: With pleasure. It’s excellent advice, and I’m glad you asked. Here it is:
Dear Ann Landers: Everyone wants their kids to succeed, but how many parents are willing to expend the energy and spend the time to make sure they have the prime ingredient? It is responsibility.
Responsibility must be taught from the time a 1-year-old can throw a toy into the basket until he or she leaves the nest. As a parent of three children, 9, 6 and 5, I find it a daily challenge to teach my children to be responsible for their actions. It would be easier to let things slide, but it is my job to teach them to be responsible human beings.
“Who left the light on? Come and turn it off.”
“Wipe up the milk you spilled.”
“Call your piano teacher, and tell her you’re too sick to go to your lesson. I won’t do it for you.”
“OK, guys, you and your friends clean up the mess you made in the basement. Remember, that was our agreement.”
It’s much easier to pick up after a kid than to keep on his case, but children do learn, even though they gripe and grumble. They get the message. It’s exasperating to work with people who show up late (or not at all). We all know folks who are notorious no-shows, can’t be depended on to keep their word and have wonderful excuses for everything. Look around at the men and women who are successful, and you will find they have one thing in common. It is a sense of responsibility. - From the Old School in Greenwich ,
Dear G.: Your little sermon was right on the money. Too bad that old school in Greenwich doesn’t have more graduates.
Dear Ann Landers: I recently read a simple, fast recipe for brownies that was described as “yummy.” The recipe called for a devil’s food pudding cake mix. I am an excellent baker and usually bake from scratch. However, I also have many quick and easy cake-mix recipes that can be thrown together at a moment’s notice, so I decided to try that brownie recipe.
I gave my chocolate-loving neighbor six brownies and was stunned when she phoned to say they were “flavorless, not sweet enough and just plain awful.” She said, “I happen to be an honest person. I’m sure most people would have thrown these brownies out and told you they were wonderful, but I am returning them.” She then hung the bag of brownies on my front door knob.
Was this honesty or what? I felt insulted and hurt. Incidentally, my children and I enjoyed the brownies with a glass of milk. They weren’t bad. - No Name in Pa.
Dear Pa.: Your neighbor was extremely ungracious. If she didn’t like the brownies, she should have said, “Thank you for your thoughtfulness,” and left it at that. Cross that hamhanded clod off your list for future baked goods.