Cheap Seats

But are Quarter Pounders outselling sushi?

Former major leaguer Orestes Destrade, who played four seasons in Japan, thinks Japanese players like Hideki Irabu have a better understanding of culture in the United States than Americans have of Japan.

“They are fascinated with the West,” Destrade said. “They know Elvis and McDonald’s. They get American baseball games on TV; they’re up on it.”

Like we’re not up on the latest karaoke tunes.

A stamp of approval

The Tuscaloosa, Ala., post office has ordered 300,000 Bear Bryant stamps for first-day cancellation, about six times more than were requested when the famous Elvis Presley stamp was released in 1993.

Mary Beth Lee, supervisor of customer service at the Tuscaloosa Post Office, said she wouldn’t be surprised if the main office in Birmingham failed to satisfy Tuscaloosa’s full order.

“It is the most stamps we have ever ordered at the Tuscaloosa post office for a new stamp since I’ve been here,” said Lee, who has worked there since 1973.

The commemorative stamp will be unveiled at a ceremony Aug. 7 in Tuscaloosa, two weeks after the first-day issues of a sheet of four legendary coaches - including Bryant - are released in Canton, Ohio.

Other coaches being commemorated are Green Bay Packers coach Vince Lombardi, Chicago Bears coach George Halas, and Pop Warner.

Woody Hayes was considered, but there’s no such thing as sending mail no class.

He’s no bail bondsman

Larry Walker’s much-discussed bailout from facing Seattle’s Randy Johnson in an interleague game didn’t sit well with Barry Bonds.

The San Francisco Giant outfielder had this to say to the Oakland Tribune about the Colorado Rockies outfielder’s decision to avoid Johnson:

“If I did that, I’d be squashed. The public and media would eat me alive. If I did that, I’d be on ‘Hard Copy’ and ‘Wide World of Sports.’ I’d be booed every game I played in.”

Isn’t that happening already?

Even L’il Penny won’t shell out that much

Nike will unveil its new Penny Hardaway Air Foamposite this week , the highest-priced shoe on the market, a staggering $180.

Hardaway, who in the fall will have a new line of Air Penny’s for about $150 a pair, said:

“Oh, yeah, sure I wish they were less. But there’s a process where everyone makes their profit. And by the time Nike makes them in Korea or Taiwan and sells them to a Foot Locker and pays everyone, the price is up there.

And at $1.60 daily pay, Nike’s Asian employees will be wearing theirs in time for the new school year.

Hey, it’s not like they’re leaving Beverly Hills

When 250 NCAA employees gathered in an auditorium to learn details of the organization’s move from Overland Park, Kan., to Indianapolis, boxes of Kleenex were passed around.

Said Steve Rosenbloom of the Chicago Tribune: “Just the thought of Indianapolis will do that to people.”

The last word …

“It’s a big word and I don’t know any big words.”

- Philadelphia pitcher Garrett Stephenson when asked to explain what went wrong with his knee.

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo