Cheap Seats
To dunk or not to dunk?
New York Knicks forward Buck Williams on how his coach juggles lineups:
“It’s more difficult for Jeff Van Gundy. He has so much talent. It would be like sitting there with 12 Shakespeares on the bench. Which one are you going to use night in and night out?
“If you had eight Shakespeares and, I don’t know, four sportswriters, it makes it easier.”
Especially since everyone knows sportswriters can’t make a layup, can’t make a free throw, can’t make a deadline …
Blurring line between boxing and wrestling
Heavyweight Peter McNeeley, fighting for just the second time in 16 months, was awarded a victory last Saturday night when Larry Menefee put a headlock on him and tried to ram him into the ring post.
Referee Chuck Hassett immediately stopped the bout, scheduled for 10 rounds, declaring McNeeley, of Boston, the winner by disqualification at 2:19 of the eighth round.
The fight was a brawl from the beginning, and the capacity crowd of nearly 1,000 was extremely vocal throughout.
“No matter what happens in a fight these days, I always feel like I’m the winner in life,” said McNeeley, who was stopped by Mike Tyson in the first round on Aug. 19, 1995, in Tyson’s first fight after being released from prison. “Everyone knows my drug history, and I’m just thankful to God to be participating.”
McNeeley, 29, says he’s been clean and sober for seven months. Before being admitted to a rehabilitation center a little over a year ago, he admitted to having a $1,000 a day cocaine habit.
Ownership, sex … what else is there?
Harry Ornest, former owner of the St. Louis Blues and the Toronto Argonauts and current vice chairman of Hollywood Park, on the merits of sports ownership: “If you own your own arena and you own the major tenant, it’s the next best thing to having sex, if you are having sex. If you’re not having sex, it’s the best thing.”
Unrealistic goal?
Damon Stoudamire has challenged Raptors GM Glen Grunwald to make a trade to shake up the team, and made it clear he wouldn’t mind if the change included him. Someone asked Raptors coach Darrell Walker, whose team is 5-31, what his New Year’s resolution was. “Not to kill myself,” he said.
Keeping it alive
According to Sports Illustrated, 25 years after his celebrated catch in the Pittsburgh Steelers’ playoff victory over the Oakland Raiders, Franco Harris is promoting a cellular phone service that promises “immaculate reception.”
Cruel but true
Mike Monroe of the Denver Post on the Nuggets, who have the NBA’s worst record at 2-31 (going into Tuesday’s game):
“Losing to the Nuggets has been a mark of shame for any team, let alone good ones. Now even the bottom feeders regard the Nuggets as the real pond scum.”
Found his niche
Indiana Pacer rookie Austin Croshere, the No. 12 pick in the draft, who is earning more than $1 million despite having hardly played: “I think I’m the highest paid baggage-handler in the world.”
The last word …
“Evander Holyfield says he hasn’t ruled out fighting Mike Tyson again. When asked why he’d want another fight with Tyson, he said, ‘I’d like my ears to match.”’ - NBC’s Conan O’Brien
, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo