Cheap Seats
Other than that, NBA is fantastic
Nick Canepa of the San Diego Union-Tribune writes that he was once hooked on the NBA in the days of Oscar Robertson, Elgin Baylor, Bill Russell and Jerry West. Not anymore.
“ … The player lockout has meant very little to me, being that most of the games are unwatchable, and the league is loaded down with undisciplined, uncaring, stinking-rich, fundamentally unsound, dunking, taunting, trash-talking, foul-shot-missing, jump-shotmissing, pot-smoking adolescents who have taken very little time to learn the true beauty of what once was a magnificent game.”
Quick, call Bruce Willis
Will this year’s Super Bowl be the last one?
Don’t laugh. Randall Cunningham isn’t. He hopes everyone is ready when the time comes.
“I read the Bible and there have been so many prophetic things that have come true, even this year,” he said… . There’s something going to happen that’s very, very powerful. It’s no coincidence that we’re going into a new millennium. It’s no coincidence that our president is being persecuted. It’s all biblical. If you just search the Scriptures, you’ll see all these things happened … wars, the famines, the plagues, the earthquakes, all those things have already taken place, so it’s just the birth pains (of Armageddon).”
It was just too much for Los Angeles Times sportswriter T.J. Simers to resist. Here’s a sampling from Simers:
“Nostradamus, in 1555, predicted the end of the world in the eighth month of 1999, which probably makes it a moot point who replaces Marty Schottenheimer as coach in Kansas City.
After losing in four previous Super Bowl games, the folks in Minnesota were only kidding when they said the world would end the day the Vikings finally win one.
Apparently, this year’s Super Bowl really will be “do or die.”
Get your facts straight
In an interview with Playboy magazine, boxer Mike Tyson ripped Wallace Matthews of the New York Post: “(He) called me a `rapist recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”
House of Bruise
Football fans who patronize the House of Blues on the Sunset Strip in Los Angeles may do a double take when they see the side-door bouncer.
It could be Darnell Autry, Northwestern’s halfback who ran for 110 yards and three touchdowns in the 1996 Rose Bowl game. Frustrated by lack of action during a brief NFL career, Autry came to Los Angeles to pursue an acting career.
Rick Telander of the Chicago Sun-Times caught up with him at the House of Blues where Autry is picking up a few bucks and hoping he gets seen by the proper people. His football experience came in handy the other night when a drunk jumped on the stage and Autry tackled him.
“Oh, man, it all came back to me,” he told Telander. “I tackled him good. You know, face up, hips low, explode from the hips. Boom!”
The last word …
“Everyone has some fear. A man who has no fear belongs in a mental institution. Or on special teams.”
- Former New York Jets coach Walt Michaels