Cheap Seats
And a mouth like Mr. Ed’s A horse is a horse, of course, of course, unless the horse is the famous … Fusaichi Pegasus.
Skip Baylesss of the Chicago Tribune writes on what the Kentucky Derby winner equates to in modernday sports:
“Next he’ll threaten to sit out the Preakness. He’ll call a news conference at Barn 41 and say he wants more peppermint candy or he’s not running.
He’ll refer subsequent questions to his new agent, David Falk.
“He’ll sign a horseshoe contract with Nike. Spike Lee will be seen riding him around the backstretch, gathering movie material. He’ll do TV ads for Quaker Oats, winking his approval. Mobil endorsements will be a natural for Fusaichi Pegasus.
“From MJ to FP, a horse for the new millennium. Horse? This is as close as we’ve come to an equine superjock, mirroring today’s young studs whose athleticism is equaled only by their arrogance. You can almost hear Fusaichi Pegasus scoffing at all the Vince Carter hype by calling himself `half horse, half amazing.”’
Are you ready to rumba?
Richard Wilner in the New York Post, writing about prospects for wrestling czar Vince McMahon’s XFL pro football league:
“Each XFL team will probably employ a dance instructor because each team will have a unique end-zone dance.
“What does this have to do with football? Nothing. But then, what does the WWF have to do with wrestling?”
What if?
Stan Hochman of the Philadelphia Daily News, describing a recent conversation with pro basketball Hall of Famer Bill Russell:
“I asked Russell something I’ve always wondered about. What if Chamberlain had played in Boston in the ‘60s and Russell had played in Philadelphia, which team would have won NBA titles?
“`Wherever I was,’ Russell said swiftly, then erupted in that trademarked cackle that rattled the glassware behind the bar.
“`Actually, we talked about it once. Briefly. Wilt said he would not have won as many titles in Boston as I did. Because of the energy flow, Wilt’s teammates had to get him the ball so he could do his thing.
“`I got the ball to my teammates and I didn’t require anything of them in return.”’ He’d sound marvelous Nick Canepa of the San Diego Union-Tribune, speculating on candidates for ABC’s “Monday Night Football” announcing team, throws out the name of Billy Crystal, “who does a fabulous Cosell.”
The last word …
“That was nice of them to do that. Probably a lot of them are saying, `Who’s he?”’
- Don Shula after getting an ovation when introduced at the Miami Dolphins’ first practice this spring.