Close door on unknown residents

Dear Miss Manners: My apartment is part of a large complex in a busy metropolitan area. Signs posted near the exterior doors indicate that each person entering should use his or her own key to ensure that nonresidents do not enter.

It seems unbearably rude, however, to let the door slam shut behind me when another person is following just after me or (somehow worse, because I might seem to simply be saving time) a few seconds away. An apology or apologetic look seems insufficient for “Can’t hold the door, you might be a criminal.” I worry about this every day on my way home. Miss Manners, what should I do?

Gentle Reader: Work on your apologetic look. You should apear to be horribly torn between your duty to obey the rules of the building and your duty to obey the normal courtesy of holding a door for someone behind you.

Turn around to face the other person, rather than walking away in front of the closing door. Draw your eyebrows together, open your mouth slightly, and hold out your hands helplessly. Then shake your head sadly.

Should the person produce a key and enter, you will be able to say, “Terribly sorry, I was just following the house rules.” If no key is produced, you may consider that it is not rude to turn away an intruder.