John Deen’s life mirrored the dramatic cultural change simultaneously under way in America’s views of homosexuality.

Deen grew up in Oklahoma, where he followed the usual red-blooded American male stereotypes of his era: He played football, served in the U.S. Army and married his high school sweetheart.

It wasn’t until he was 35 that he realized he was gay.

In the years since, he, along with the rest of the country, underwent a profound transformation in his understanding of homosexuality and human rights.

Deen died at age 72 last month, and on Sunday at Dempsey’s Brass Rail in downtown Spokane, people gathered to pay tribute to his life. They recognized his two primary public accomplishments during his years in Spokane. Here he kept the financially precarious Stonewall News alive for 10 years as its publisher, and he used his energy and passion to help prod the city of Spokane into passing a human rights ordinance. It banned discrimination based on race, religion, color, sex, national origin, marital status, familial status, age, disability and sexual orientation.

Deen was a bright, articulate, yet complicated and stubborn man, his friends and family say. He’d work 20-hour days to produce each issue of the Stonewall News, collapse and then start the cycle all over again. With that platform, he advocated for equality, drummed up support for gay causes and sent out a tangible, monthly reminder to members of Spokane’s gay community: You are not alone.

Members of the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered community still turn to that newspaper, which he sold in 2005, for coverage of stories that particularly affect their lives, as well as calendar listings of social and political events designed to connect them.

Near the end of his life, Deen saw Spokane as undergoing a metamorphosis. It seemed to be transforming from a community where gay voices were largely kept quiet to one learning to listen with new respect.

Deen spent his last days battling lung cancer. People described him as cantankerous and curmudgeonly.

But he should also be remembered as one of the consciences of this community. Like other outspoken activists, he broke down barriers so that everyone else could begin important conversations.

In his lifetime, he saw both the country and the city of Spokane engage in public dialogue that would have been unthinkable when he was young.

He helped us see the value and dignity of the lives of this city’s gay residents. And now, in remembrances and tributes, it’s important to recognize he was a man whose loves echoed our own.

Along with the power of words and journalism, his passions included the Oklahoma Sooners, the Washington State Cougars, the movie “Bus Stop” with Marilyn Monroe, yellow roses and a huge calico cat named Bo Derek.

As the debates about gay unions and family life continue, it’s especially significant to remember John Deen’s proudest accomplishments of all.

They were his daughter, Marianne Pavlish, and his grandchildren, 14-year-old Josh and 9-year-old Alicia.

Among Pavlish’s favorite words to describe her fiery activist father are these: gentle, nurturing and loving.