The Slice Today’s Blue-Light Special Is A Hands-On Experience

Who says garage sales are boring?

A reader named Lois told about the time she was at a crowded sale and felt a man fondling her backside. She loudly told him to keep his hands to himself. “I’m sorry, lady,” he responded. “I thought you were my wife.”

Sharing the rent doesn’t make you buddies: Late one recent weekday morning, three Spokane police officers huddled on the sidewalk and then headed into a North Side tavern. They emerged a few minutes later and headed down the block.

About 10 minutes after that, a guy in a flannel shirt stepped out of the bar and looked around. “They gone?” he asked.

He took a drag on his cigarette and grimaced for a second. “I think they’re looking for my roommate,” he said. “He got a DWI and I don’t think he went to court.”

He took another drag. “Hope they nail him.”

The case for just staying in bed: We were out walking early one morning when we came upon a stretch of sidewalk caught in a sprinklers crossfire. So we veered into the street and continued our stroll. But we must have come too close to a parked car with a super-sensitive security system. Because a hellacious alarm ripped the morning stillness. And our ears were ringing for what seemed like a long time.

INW mythological figures, according to Bruce DeFrates: 1. Bars, the god of desperate Spokane singles. 2. Fore, the god of cheap greens fees. 3. Zoos, the god of endangered animal parks. 4. Clog, the god of north-south traffic and I-90 rush hour. 6. Trent, the god of industrial blight.

Thefts that tested readers’ faith in humanity include: The time someone swiped all the lilies from Lisa Long’s garden on Mother’s Day.

Sandy Kessler was skiing at Lookout Pass when someone made off with the laces from her winter boots. And Kim Rhoads told about the time her car was parked up at Stevens Pass and someone stole the tire chains right off her wheels.

Warm-up question: What did you think had been said the first time you heard someone say “Gotta jet”?

Today’s Slice question: Would you be as put off by another car’s thunderous stereo system if the music being blasted out was something you actually liked?

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Drawing of an airplane

MEMO: The Slice appears Monday, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098.