Toss the resolutions and stick with reality

As we enter a new year, for many, the sight of a fresh, blank calendar fills their minds with fantastic possibilities.

For others a chill of dread descends.

It’s that traditional time for making resolutions … or choosing to not make them.

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions. I can see the steel-jawed trap just waiting to snap shut on my failures. Who needs to go into a new year discouraged in advance?

Not keeping New Year’s resolutions is fodder for comedians and naggers everywhere. Why supply them with more material? I say, keep your dignity and avoid the guilt and merriment invoked by your failures.

I do better taking on challenges when I’m good and ready for them. Or the need for them, without warning, comes upon me and it’s undeniably necessary to make changes. Sort of a personal Waterloo. Then I amaze myself with my focus and motive that keeps me on track.

So, knowing I’m going to botch things up no matter what I determine, I’ve decided to declare “inevitabilities” – human failings I’m likely to commit and then solutions I can take. This way I can both fail and succeed, a win-win proposition.

So, in this spirit I will undoubtedly:

“Procrastinate and let papers in my office pile up. Then I’ll periodically take a day to throw out now ancient “immediate attention” materials, old reference articles, such as “Will man go to the moon?” and expired coupons, etc. Dust my workstation and vow to never let this happen again. What a way to feel righteous.

“Let my already-read e-mail accumulate into the hundreds. Maybe I’ll just close my eyes and hit delete on the whole shebang. Ow, that hurts.

“Unintentionally say something offensive or hurtful. If the person will kindly let me, I’ll be properly appalled and make repentant amends which include chocolate and/or coffee. There will be a three-month expiration date, however. I can’t be sorry for what I don’t know.

“Hold up the line at the grocery store in some way. I shall smile weakly and be a fount of gracious apology to the checker and those behind me.

“Accidentally cut someone off on the road. I shall allow a few others to cut in front of me to make up for it, with no smart remarks.

“Be late for a medical appointment by a few minutes. I’ll be 10 minutes early for several others and cool my heels in waiting rooms for at least 45 minutes trying to make sense of Golf Digest.

“Have a difficult time finding clothes that aren’t tailored for a 20-year old. Not much I can do about this. Thanks, clothes manufacturers.

“Continue to struggle with fibromyalgia’s chronic pain and fatigue. Ah, here I have something going – an exercise plan with a ball and weights that actually works. So I resolve to soldier on, increasing weights to be more fit and keep losing weight.

“Have brain fog and goof up a recipe. Hey, dear, we’re trying a new dish tonight! Two points for creativity.

“Forget a name. Several names. Your name. I’ll smile brightly and fake it. Or acknowledge I have crater-like holes in my brain and admit it.

“Peruse disgusting tabloids at checkout counters. I’ll go home and read classics, feeling thankful I’m not burdened with the “tragedies” of rich, spoiled celebrities.

“Get depressed over stretches of gloomy, gray days. When it’s sunny, I’ll grab my camera and force myself outside to soak up some needed rays.

You might want to try my approach to the New Year’s dilemma. You don’t need a specific, emotionally-loaded date to begin courting failure. Be proactive in recognizing your human failings and dealing with them in a natural, self-affirming way. You’ll be more relaxed and likely to improve your life.

Until you have to deal with that next pile on your desk.

Happy New Year!