Sleep remains elusive at my house. My kids are 3 and 5 and even though they start off in their own beds each night, they often end up with mom and dad (or with mom, and dad having to move to one of their beds) by morning time.

 

As infants and toddlers, they also never took regular naps. Nowadays, they often don’t nap at all.

 

I’ve become accustomed to staying up late at night or waking up early to get work done. I’ve also stopped struggling against our unusual sleeping habits. By just letting them in our bed, we at least get an extra hour of sleep, even though the quality of sleep isn't always great.

 

Looking back, I wish we had bought that king-size bed.

 

Or, I should’ve been better about establishing sleep patterns. According to a new study, moms and dads who believe in drawing boundaries at bedtime end up with good sleepers.

 

In “The Juggle,” a Wall Street Journal blog, reporter Sue Shellenbarger wrote about a recent study that indicated how a parents’ beliefs in infant sleep can predict a child’s sleeping patterns. Here's an excerpt from her post, "Is the Key to Getting Babies to Sleep Ignoring Them?"

 

If an expectant mom thinks babies who cry at night are suffering distress and need to be soothed and comforted, her baby is likely to have more wakeful, weepy nights later, after controlling for other factors. … Mothers who believed in comforting crying babies at night also tended to be more active in trying to soothe them, holding or feeding them or bringing them into their own beds. These behaviors led to poorer sleep for the babies. … On the other hand, mothers who believed in limiting their involvement were less activist at night and also had babies who awakened less.

I was the kind of mom who would get up several times a night to comfort and nurse my baby – sometimes even waking up seconds before my child started to cry (which now makes me wonder if it was me who woke up my kid up in the first place). We also co-slept, so I didn’t exactly get up. I did this with both children until they were about 2 ½.

 

I’ve never been a good sleeper myself so I’m wondering if I’ve simply passed on bad habits to my kids.

 

How much sleep do you get at your house?

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