For Certain This Madonna Is Having Good Body Odor

In an interview with the Hungarian magazine Blikk, Madonna sounds as if she’s uttering dialogue Steve Martin might write.

Blikk: “Budapest says hello with arms that are spread-eagled. Did you have a visit here that was agreeable? Are you in good odor?” Madonna: “Thank you for saying these compliments (holds up hands). Please stop with taking sensationalist photographs until I have removed my garments for all to see (laughs). This is a joke I have made.”

Blikk: “Madonna, let’s cut toward the hunt: Are you a bold hussy-woman that feasts on men who are tops?”

Madonna: “Yes, yes… In America it is not considered to be mentally ill when a woman advances on her prey in a discotheque setting with hardy cocktails present.”

Loose talk

Richard Dreyfuss on spending the night at the White House (in People magazine): “I called my kids from the Lincoln bedroom. My daughter said, ‘That’s so cool! Steal something!”’

Me Tarzan, you Jane the senior citizen

Maureen O’Sullivan turns 85 today.

When? As Johnny Mathis sang, ‘Until the 12th of Never…”

Just as soon as former “Jeffersons” and “Amen” star Sherman Helmsley won a $3 million lawsuit against a film distributor, the actor’s “Amen” co-star Anna Maria Horsford sued him for $14,000. She loaned it to him, she says, on a handshake deal. Helmsley’s spokesman says Horsford will get the money.

If we had a Hammer, we’d call him long di-is-tance

Remember Hammer, the “Can’t Touch This” dance-rap artist? Well, bankruptcy has reduced the performer to hawking long-distance for pay. He claims to have $10 million in debts and few, if any, resources.

Next up: the first of many reunion tours

From the music scene: One unsubstantiated report (our favorite kind) has it that the Red Hot Chili Peppers are calling it a career. The ostensible reason: Flea is tired of touring.

It’s cool only when you do it in the movie, yes?

When television sitcom “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” becomes distribution fodder, don’t look for star Will Smith to return to his former career as a rapper. “Rap has changed so drastically,” he says. “Somewhere along the line it became hip to be ignorant. It got cool to be a killer. How can that be cool?”

And what was her reaction? Mummy’s the word

Another sign of the coming apocalypse: Anne Rice has sold film rights to her book “The Mummy” to 20th Century Fox for $3 mil. Her most famous book, “Interview With the Vampire,” garnered only $2 million.

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 2 Color photos

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Dan Webster