Personal Assistants Handle Everyday Tasks For Stars

Try this for a day at the office: You spend your morning tracking down a bagpipe player for a memorial service to be hosted by your boss. Several phone calls later, you step out into the garden to help his son unearth bugs for a school project. Next, you make a quick run to the dry cleaners, wanting to get back in time to confer with his publicist about pending interviews.

Welcome to the dizzying life of a celebrity personal assistant, where no task is too menial or outrageous.

As a helper to the honored, you become the glue that holds a star’s life together, handling everything from paying the bills to taking the parrot to the acupuncturist.

“A performer’s career is so demanding that they don’t have time to deal with all the mundane tasks of daily life,” explains Pattee Mack, personal assistant to Nick Nolte and president of the Association of Celebrity Personal Assistants.

Members have served the likes of William Baldwin, Sheryl Crow, Kirk Douglas, Helen Hunt and Sharon Stone. It isn’t uncommon for celebrities to employ more than one assistant; Disney chairman Michael Eisner reportedly has six.

The ACPA’s members meet on a regular basis to share tricks of the trade, ranging from where to find a life-size chocolate leg to who to call for a nip and a tuck.

Aides also operate as gatekeepers, always mindful that they work for public figures who try to lead private lives. Anyone who wishes to contact “Beverly Hills 90210’s” Tiffani-Amber Thiessen, for instance, must go through her assistant first.

“I act as a funnel, filtering through the myriad of people who wish to contact her,” says Thiessen’s assistant, 36-year-old Dean Johnson. That includes reading through fan mail to respond to admirers and ensuring that stalkers haven’t made their way into the pile.

“You have to be able to do anything, and quickly,” adds Leeza Tander-Tostenson, personal assistant to Oscar-nominated actress Lindsay Crouse.

Tander-Tostenson does everything from dealing with the washing-machine repairman to making sure Couscous the kitten doesn’t bolt from her boss’ Pacific Palisades home.

Still, perks do exist: first-class tickets around the world, VIP treatment and a sneak peek at the way the rich and famous live their lives.

Admits Johnson: “There’s nothing like walking down a red carpet once in a while in your life.”